Past or Future?
by MyOwnLilWorld97
Summary: After the breakup Alec is crushed and does everything he can to move on but he just can't. Magnus just tries to forget and get on with his life. Living forever means there's a lot to distract you isn't there? But what if that distraction comes in all black shadowhunter gear with big blue eyes?
1. Chapter 1: Alec

Beep Beep Beep

A hand shot out of the darkness to grab hold of the clock and threw it against the wall. The figure got up and grabbed for a bottle on the nightstand. He tipped back the bottle and drained the remains of it before throwing it across the room.

It was dark outside and he couldn't help but feel cold. He was used to waking up in strong warm arms and having spiky hair tickle his face.

The man got up and attempted to find some clothes in the mass pile lying around the room. He squinted in the darkness at his phone. It was running out of battery after not being charged for so long.

The time read a little after 2pm. He had a bunch of missed calls and texts from his family and friends. He frowned he always called at least once every couple of..days…weeks? He couldn't really remember.

There were at least 20 calls from Jace and even more from Izzy. His inbox was full of unread texts, but as he scrolled through them he saw none from the one person he wanted to hear from the most…his boyfriend…sorry ex-boyfriend.

His head was still reeling from all the alcohol he drank last night. Being drunk all the time he was used to the empty feeling and terrible hangovers.

After he found some semi decent clean clothes to wear he decided to face his family and called them with the little battery he had left.

Izzy answered in one ring.

"WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU—" followed by bangs and cursing then a new voice came over the phone

"YOU STUPID MORONIC DESTRUCTIVE IDIOT"

"Hi Izzy, hi Jace it's good to hear from you but my battery is almost dead so don't yell at me now."

"Oh don't worry there will be plenty of that later!" He heard his sister screeching in the phone.

"I guess I owe an apology…" He began as he attempted to gather all his stuff off the floor.

"More than an apology Alexander Gideon Lightwood, I have worry lines scarring my perfect face because of you." He heard Jace saying accusingly.

Alec grinned despite the situation.

"So where the hell are you so I can yell at you more because I don't think Izzy would be happy if her new phone's speaker gets broken."

"Wait new phone? Since when?" Alec asked almost without thinking.

Alec heard more noises on the other end and more cursing. He could just imagine the two of them wrestling for the phone. "I threw the other one at you when you left and it broke, remember."

"Ah I remember now, that was…."

"Exactly 32 days and about well if you really want me to figure out the hours and minutes… " Jace started but was cut off by a loud impatient voice

"Just come home, or tell us where you are so we can come –"

"I won't tell you, I'll just come home don't worry about it." Alec shut off the phone with a snap and shoved it into his pocket. He gathered all his clothes and other things in his duffel bag.

He stepped out of the apartment he had been living in for a couple of weeks now or as Jace said 32 days. Right after the breakup he just wanted to be alone and a cheap rundown apartment sounded perfect to him.

He walked across the street and saw the High Warlock of Brooklyn's loft just around the corner. He groaned "I'm really trying to punish myself aren't I?"

Why he chose to live so close to the stupid warlock was beyond him. He must have been drunk when he picked the apartment. Not a surprise.

He headed to the institute despite not being there in forever he still knew the way by heart. He grimaced at his passing reflection on a store window. His hair was disheveled and his clothes had holes in them, especially his sweater. Now looking at his sweater he saw a stain on it from who knows where.

He purposely avoided the warlock's loft and took the long way home. Lost in thought he almost ran into the door of the institute. Realizing he didn't have his keys he took a deep breath but before he could say anything the door opened and a figure leaped onto him his golden hair flashing in the sun.

The two boys fell with a thud. The attacker pushed a blade into Alec's throat.

"Uhh?" Alec said glancing up at his Parabatai who was glaring at him, the sun reflecting off him in rays.

"The correct term is mercy and we're not even playing the game." Jace said grabbing Alec and pulling him up.

Before he could say anything Izzy's electric whip wrapped around Alec's feet holding him to the spot. She raced to him and flung into his arms. Thanks to her whip he managed to be put right back onto the ground.

"I missed you guys you know." Alec said with a smile. They looked the same as always but there were dark shadows under their eyes probably from worry more than anything.

"Where is everyone by the way?" Alec said stepping into the institute. It was quiet and dark. The air smelled dusty like it hadn't been cleaned in weeks. He could see cobwebs and all the curtains were closed shut.

"Mom and Dad are in Idris doing some official whatever." Izzy shrugged, she kicked open the door to his room and plopped down on the bed.

"You kept it clean for me all this time." Alec commented sarcastically at the dusty and dirty room, just as he left it that stupid unforgettable night.

He put his stuff down and plopped down next to Izzy.

Jace followed. "Just like the rest of this place. Absolutely fantastic."

They all laughed and stayed like that for awhile. After talking for a bit, Alec got caught up with everything he missed. Not much happened while he was gone and he didn't have any exciting news for them either.

"You guys wana go out to Takis'?" Izzy said getting up.

"Yes let's celebrate with cheap food and bad gas." Jace said helping Alec up.

"Sounds good, let me change." Alec looked around in his drawers and found that they were mostly empty. Weird he thought he didn't bring all that much stuff with him to his new apartment which was nearly empty.

"Hey where's all my stuff…"

Jace and Izzy looked at each other with an expression that had Oh Crap! all over it.

Then it hit him. He never went back to HIS apartment to get all his stuff back…

"It's at Magnus' still, isn't it."

* * *

_Uh hi! I just finished COLS and I know they broke up :( so I just had to write my feels out. If you guys have any suggestions on the next chapter It'll help me out since I have no idea where this story is going...but I'll try!_


	2. Chapter 2: Magnus

Meow! A little fur ball of a creature jumped onto his owner trying in vain to wake him up.

Sleepy golden green cat eyes stared back into the cat. The man stretched and rolled off the couch stepping over empty take out cartons and trash. He looked around his loft which was a dull white color. There was nothing on the walls and the décor looked like something out of a retirement home.

"I really need to redecorate. What do you think Chairman Meow?"

The cat seemed to roll his eyes and settled on what looked like a big white pillow.

As he got closer he noticed it was a big pile of mail all addressed to the High Warlock of Brooklyn: Magnus Bane.

He considered staying home and earning money since he had been burning through his savings in the last month. His last job if he remembered correctly was the same night he had broken up with...

Magnus sighed in fustration and ran his hands through his hair. Maybe watching chick flicks all day and eating junk food didn't sound so bad but looking at the window he thought it would be a perfect time to get out of his miserable prison.

He got dressed in a simple t-shirt with shorts. He completed the look with plain black sneakers. Normally he would have a neon color jacket with some matching color leather pants and maybe some knee high boots or something. With, of course, more than a healthy amount of glitter everywhere.

But lately he didn't feel like it. He kept his hair down and long. The last time he tried with all the glitter and extravagance he almost burned his loft and his hair off. He wanted to dress just like how he felt: boring, unexciting and depressing.

Just like a mundane he thought.

He glanced at himself in the mirror and shuddered. "Normal" just looked ugly on him.

"Chairman Meow be good." He called back to his cat and slammed the door on his way out. Before he knew it his feet was taking him to Takis. A diner he knew well. One that he and his boyfriend…ex-boyfriend used to go to eat often. It was one of Alec's all time favorite places to go.

Just thinking about him made Magnus feel like something heavy was resting on his heart. It was times like this when he let himself remember all their good times together that he realized just how truly alone he was in this world.

He shook his head. "What are the chances of me running into him right now anyways." Magnus scoffed. He noticed his shoes were untied and bent over to tie them.

"I know a perfect way to get back at him!" A voice exclaimed just behind him. Magnus recognizing it dove behind a bush peeking over it slowly.

Isabelle Lightwood was walking backwards facing her two brothers.

"Wait two brothers!?" Magnus thought, his heart beating a little faster. He saw Alec with Jace both smiling at Isabelle. Alec looked worse than Magnus did. His hair was disheveled and his clothes filled with multiple stains. It looked like he hadn't shaved in weeks.

Magnus didn't know what to think. He was still angry and he could feel the betrayal and hurt in his heart. But he could also feel the longing and love he felt every time he looked at the oldest Lightwood. The kind of love that never truly went away. It was like an odd opposite feeling, hot and cold, light and dark, bitter and sweet.

He was forced back into reality when they began to talk again. The trio stopped in front of where Magnus was hiding.

What were the odds Magnus asked himself rolling his eyes.

"Get back at him for what? It's not like he cheated on me or anything…I betrayed him." Alec said looking down at his feet.

The other two looked at Alec with a sort of curious expression.

"No, I'm not explaining why." Alec said firmly.

"If you don't explain then I'm going to assume." Isabelle said spinning around to face him her eyes determined. "Trust me the best way to get him back is jealousy, every girl knows this."

Jace put his arms around Alec. "Listen to the professional."

"That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard." Alec said shaking his head. "I don't need relationship advice from you."

"Why not? We're obviously more experienced and don't forget you are lacking in this area of expertise my dear friend." Jace said with his trademark smirk.

"Agreed and who knows you might even get back together." Isabelle said pulling them forward.

Alec stopped and shook his head. "I don't think that's going to get him back. I can't just do that to him."

"Do what? Move on? I think you're long overdue for a rebound guy." Jace shrugged with Isabelle nodding in agreement.

"Can we please just go!" Alec cried out stomping away. The two followed muttering under their breath.

Magnus sat on the floor crossed legged.

"So he didn't tell them anything about why we broke up…Not like it's their business anyways." He shrugged. After seeing Alec in so long Magnus suddenly lost his appetite but he was way too curious to do anything but follow the three shadowhunters.

He got up swiftly and entered Taki's through the back door. He sat down on a table right behind the Lightwoods. He was covered by a wall so he felt safe eavesdropping. He peeked over and he could see that Alec's back was to him along with Jace who was sitting next to him with Isabelle sitting across from them.

"Why did you break up with him? I mean I thought he was…you know…the one." Isabelle was saying sipping her drink.

"He broke up with me technically." Alec said.

"His lost then." Isabelle shrugged like it wasn't her problem but Magnus knew she was dying from curiosity but knew better than to pry.

"That just proves my point of moving on." Jace said picking at his food.

"You guys don't understand." Alec groaned.

"Then help us understand you helpless helpless self torturing idiot. We can't help if we don't know how." Isabelle was saying clearly irritated.

"And if that help involves finding and painfully torturing a certain warlock than I know exactly where to start." Jace replied stabbing into his food with a knife.

"Don't make Magnus out to the bad guy. Because he wasn't! He isn't!" Alec replied angrily his voice on edge. Magnus could see his back muscles tense up like it always did when he got defensive.

Magnus couldn't help but feel proud that Alec was defending him.

"Well if he hurt you than – "Isabelle began only to be interrupted by Alec.

"He gave up so much to help us with all our stupid petty problems because we were to weak and stupid to do it by ourselves. He never asked for anything in return not even a single penny. Don't forget that, that he was always there for us, for me." Alec stopped there and Magnus could see him clenching the table so hard that it was shaking.

Magnus sucked in his breath, it felt like someone was pulling a string at his heart making it hard to breathe. A part of him was happy that Alec would defend him but another part of him turned bitter because what he said was true. He really did give up a lot for them.

Alec continued his rant. "And I blew it. I threw away my first love and my first relationship. For what? It was because I was jealous and insecure and – "He stopped there and took a deep breath. " I don't think I can fix it." His voice was shaky like he was trying not to cry. "I don't know what to do."

Magnus was shocked into silence. Alec was never the one for speeches, he was never good at words he had once told Magnus. Magnus had to fight every instinct he had to jump up from his seat and sob into the shadowhunter's dirty sweater to tell him how sorry he was and how he overreacted that night. He wanted to kiss his tears away and tell him everything was going to be OK. That he forgave him.

He was so deep in thought that he jumped up when a girl suddenly sat across from him.

"What the hell are you doing? This is a private table." Magnus glared Alec's rant was still replaying in his mind.

The girl stood up and looked at him with an exasperated expression. "I work here and it's my job to bug you. Now are you going to order or just eavesdrop on my friends over there." The girl said motioning for him the sit down.

Magnus looked down and sighed in relief. "Oh it's you Kaelie." The faerie waitress looked at him closely.

She gasped pushing his hair out of his face. "Oh my god! Magnus Bane is that you?"

The two of them sat down, Kaelie looked at him with wide eyes like she was seeing a ghost. "Everybody thought you were dead."

"I wonder why." Magnus mused.

"Maybe because you haven't gone this long without throwing a party since…I don't know, probably the stone ages." Kaelie said smiling.

"I haven't been in the party mood I suppose." Magnus said playing with a sugar packet absentmindedly.

Kaelie glanced at the Lightwood's table. "Are you two fighting or something?"

"We broke up." Magnus said quickly.

"Well that's something to celebrate." Kaelie said slowly fidgeting in her seat.

Magnus raised his eyebrows.

"I mean you could always have a party celebrating your newly single status. Advertising that New York's most eligible bachelor is back on the market." Kaelie said playfully winking at him.

Magnus smiled and got up. He threw some money on the table even though he didn't order anything. He could hear the Lightwoods talking in muted voices. He had enough, he didn't want to risk hearing anything that would make him want to run back to Alec.

"It was good to see you again." Magnus smiled pushing in his chair.

It's good to see anyone other than Chairman Meow he mentally corrected.

Kaelie got up. "It was good to see you too. You look umm…"

"Absolutely hideous?" Magnus said spinning around for her.

"I was going to say normal but I guess they're the same for you." She laughed.

Magnus smiled but it quickly disappeared as he glanced at Alec. He looked broken and exhausted, it hurt him to see Alec like that.

"Yeah it is." He replied and walked out of the restaurant.

As soon as he left Alec got up and threw some money on the table.

"I need to go get my stuff from Magnus's place."

"Really? Right now?" Izzy asked standing up.

"Yeah, right now or I might lose what little confidence I have left. Hopefully he's not home. I never got to return this." Alec said pulling a key out of his pocket.

* * *

_so thanks everyone for sticking with this story. I'll update as fast as I can. :) thanks to all the great ideas guys. You really inspired me to continue hope I didn't disappoint!_


	3. Chapter 3: The Fight

Alec stepped outside the restaurant he got a lucky break and both his brother and sister left him alone without much of a fight. There had been an emergency call for a pack of demons downtown so they had no choice. Alec had lied and said he left most of his weapons and his shadowhunter gear at Magnus's place and that he would join them as soon as he could.

He walked slowly to Magnus's apartment different scenarios running through his mind. Would Magnus be happy to see him, cold hearted, indifferent or maybe he was on a job or something and Alec wouldn't have to see him.

The more he thought about it he could feel his insides turn cold and jelly like. He felt his knees buckle and turned to sit against a wall. He looked across the street and noticed a liquor store.

Before he could explain to himself why it would be a bad idea to get drunk while attempting to confront his ex his feet were already moving and his hand already at his wallet pulling out some money.

* * *

Magnus kicked his door closed with a loud bang he picked up the Chairman before he could run away and walked into his room. Unlike the rest of his dull white apartment his room was pure black with no color in sight.

Magnus lay on the bed and couldn't help thinking about the way Alec's body fit perfectly with his better than his cat's he laughed. He couldn't help but remember waiting for him every night anticipating his warm body by his side and waking up to his dark tousled hair and bright blue eyes.

But the one thing Magnus still had after all these years if not more now was his pride. He wouldn't run back to Alec; he was the High Warlock of Brooklyn and he would not beg the stupid Nephilim to take him back.

Of course he had the occasional hook up at a party maybe a fling once in awhile but he had never spent this much time trying to get over one person before. Of course there were still bitter memories of past lovers and loves lost but this was the first time that he felt he really couldn't get over someone and it made him angry for some reason.

Magnus jumped up set to work on creating his latest invitation for his party. Kaelie's words of advice came back to him.

_"I mean you could always have a party celebrating your newly single status. Advertising that New York's most eligible bachelor is back on the market." _

He smiled down at his beautified party invitation complete with glitter and all the colors he could find. He snapped his fingers and the invitation began to copy itself.

He sat back smiling and got started on redecorating his apartment. Adding furniture, new sound systems, lights, random decorations and of course cleaning up made him forget the past couple of weeks.

Magnus was just in the middle of repainting his walls and changing the carpet when the door to his apartment burst open and a body stumbled forward with what Magnus could see was a large bottle with a dark brown liquid inside.

The boy was off balanced and obviously drunk. He stumbled right in front of Magnus but didn't seem to notice him.

"Now where could my stuff be?" the boy said a little unsteady on his feet.

Magnus dropped everything recognizing the boy he did a double take. "Alec? Are you drunk?"

The boy looked at Magnus shaking his head trying to focus. Magnus could tell he was by the way he slurred his words and was obviously lacking the usual grace of a shadowhunter.

"Oh." Alec said finally looking at Magnus clearly. He hid the bottle behind his back and attempted to fix his clothes and straighten out his hair.

Magnus didn't know whether to kick him out, hear what he had to say, or completely ignore him hoping he'd go away. Alec stepped forward he was a little unstable on his feet but moved across the room to where Magnus stood.

"I never got my stuff back from you."

Magnus crossed his arms. "Oh really? I'm pretty sure I asked you to do that a long time ago." He grabbed the key out of Alec's hand. "And I don't care if you have a key to my place; I still consider it breaking and entering."

Alec looked back at him steadily. "Screw you. I'll get it myself." He said pushing the bottle into Magnus's hand and stormed off in the direction of the master bedroom.

Magnus stood in shock, he had never seen Alec drunk before and it did not look good.

He glanced down at the nearly empty bottle before setting it down and running in the direction Alec went. He paused by the bedroom to find Alec passed out on the bed.

Magnus froze and cursed. He couldn't help but get closer, for a second he forgot why he was angry at Alec when he saw how innocent and young he looked. He carefully lay down next to him turning so they were face to face. Without realizing it he was leaning down so close that their lips were almost touching. Alec smelled like alcohol but Magnus didn't mind.

Magnus could probably stay just like that forever but Alec's eyes flew open and he turned quickly throwing up on the floor next to the bed. Magnus kicked him off the bed angrily; it was just like him to ruin the moment or whatever they were having.

Alec got up and stumbled into the dresser. "Oh, here's my stuff." He said not noticing Magnus behind him. He looked around. "I wonder if he has any bags I could use."

"He does actually." Magnus said throwing one at him.

Alec looked up at him with a confused face. "When did you get there?"

"You got your stuff, now get out." Magnus said shoving Alec out the door.

Alec tripped on his way out of the room reaching out to grab something to keep keep him from falling which happened to be Magnus. They both crashed into the table making all the invitations to the party fly everywhere.

They landed on a heap on the floor with Alec sprawled on top of Magnus.

"Well isn't this romantic." Magnus said irritated. But Alec wasn't focusing on him he was looking at an invitation that was on the floor. He held it up.

"What the hell is this?"

Magnus turned his head to see what he was looking at. "What does it look like? I'm having one of my all famous exclusive parties."

Alec stood up and shoved it into Magnus's face. "It says come celebrate New York's most eligible bachelor is now back on the market. Magnus Bane is Sexy, Free, and Single."

Magnus got up slowly. "You think it's too much? I don't want to sound desperate."

Alec shoved him hard in the chest. "So you're just going to advertise yourself like some toy!?"

"What does it matter to you? We are not together anymore." Magnus said motioning between them.

Alec sucked in a breath he made a face like he had forgotten that fact. He threw the paper on the ground and stomped on it. "I hope you can find someone like you."

"Like me? You mean someone devilishly handsome, tall and powerful?" Magnus replied shaking his head. "Impossible I'm one of a kind."

They stared each other down before Alec replied. "You know the kind. Immortal so you can be together forever and ever ."

"This again?" Magnus was dimly aware that he was arguing with a drunk kid.

"Or maybe a casual fling you know so you don't have to talk about your past or explain anything."

"Cut the crap Alexander."

Alec waved him off. "Be honest was I just some charity case: the High Warlock of Brooklyn helps the poor closeted gay shadowhunter."

Magnus was speechless, he wasn't the type to hit people but he pulled his arm back and hit Alec as hard as he could. Alec stumbled cupping his jaw where Magnus's hit had landed but didn't look up at him.

"Was that what you thought about our relationship? A casual fling?" Magnus roared at him.

"Didn't it seem like it!? I mean I barely know anything about you! Everything I knew I heard it second handed. We did everything normal couples did but you never let me in. I don't even know if you really loved me or if you're just like that to all your other lovers." Alec said, after holding it back what he couldn't say before.

"After everything I did for you and your friends being your damn pet warlock you think I would do that for someone I didn't love!"

"How was I any different than your endless list of lovers?" Alec demanded a question he had asked Camille before too.

"I almost gave up my immortality for you, is that a sufficient reason for you?" Magnus replied.

Alec stood there trying to come up with something to say but all that came out was.

"I need a drink." He said stomping off to the fridge. He pulled out a bottle of what looked like tequila and was in the process of chugging it down before blue sparks hit the bottle breaking it with a crash. Magnus stood on the other side of the room his hands shooting blue sparks everywhere.

"I just wanted to know more about you." Alec blurted out. Magnus looked at him confused. "That's what I was doing with Camille." Alec clarified.

Magnus scoffed, " So you were having secret meetings with my manipulative ex-girlfriend to start a Magnus Bane fanclub?"

"She was the only one I could talk to about you! Because my own boyfriend wouldn't even trust me enough to tell me anything about himself. It was like I didn't even know you at all!" Alec replied indignantly.

"You were the one that didn't trust me! You let your jealousy and insecurities blind you. After everything I did to prove how much you meant to me you still doubted me. You went behind my back and tried to shorten my life." Magnus snapped back.

Alec paled, "I...wouldn't...I just thought...never."

"Thinking about doing something is a step closer to actually doing it Alexander." Magnus said his voice quiet.

"You know I would never do that to you, I couldn't." Alec said his hands starting to shake.

"Doesn't change anything Alexander." Magnus said stepping over to him holding his bag out. "I think it's time you left."

Alec reached out to grab him. "Give me a second chance, It was a mistake."

"Maybe it's my fault or maybe it's yours...it still doesn't change what you did. We're still done. Now please go." Magnus said stepping over the invitations to open the door.

Alec stumbled after him and said with a strained voice. "The party...have fun."

Magnus said nothing but closed the door and leaned against it breathing hard. He looked at the invitations on the floor. With a snap of his fingers he sent the invitations to random people and places to be passed out.

He still wasn't in the party mood but a distraction was all he needed. That and he wished he didn't destroy his only bottle of Tequila.

* * *

_First of all thanks for all the support, I'm sorry it took so long to update this chapter was harder to write than I thought. I promise I haven't forgotten any of your suggestions I'm just taking my time with this story :) _

_I know the angst...all my feels. I just think that they need to get all their problems out in the open before they can get back together. You guys don't know how badly I just wanted them to make up in this chapter but...then the story would end so I couldn't ahaha. Thanks again everyone!_


	4. Chapter 4: I want you back

Alec stumbled on the street breathing hard; he could still feel the alcohol making his thoughts fuzzy. He was trying to make sense of the fight or whatever he just had with Magnus. He knew that he should be horrified of what he said and if he was sober he probably would be.

But it was the truth and it was something that if only he had the guts to say earlier maybe he'd be crying in Magnus's arms instead of on a dirty New York street.

"Wait." Alec thought alarmed. "Crying?" he brought his hand up to wipe away a tear. He had never cried before not even at Max's funeral and he didn't know the reason he was doing it now.

Shadowhunters didn't cry. It was a sign of weakness and weakness in the battlefield meant something your enemy could exploit. It meant defeat and death.

He looked down at his clothes filled with various alcohol stains. Even though the legal drinking age for shadowhunters was really young compared to the normal drinking age in the human world he had never touched a drop.

Sure his siblings did it…maybe too often.

Izzy had started way before it was legal and Alec or Jace had even covered for her when she got extremely drunk. Jace on the other hand never got drunk because he was just that cool but Alec never started, he really hated the smell and the taste.

Alec grimaced. "I changed my whole world for you, you know that. Damn warlock." Alec said to no one in particular.

He was tired and he knew he had to sleep everything he drank off but he was too wired and stressed to go to sleep right now. He needed to do something proactive instead of self destructive.

He called Izzy and of course she answered on the first ring.

"Hey brother, you missed all the fun you know."

"Missed? As in there are no more demons to get rid of?"

"There are always plenty of those; in fact I heard some are having a party at Pandemonium."

"And we're on the V.I.P list. Well, I am but I pulled some strings and guys can come along too." Jace said. Alec could almost hear the anticipation in his voice.

"Thanks Mr. Big shot." Alec said rummaging in his bag for gear and weapons. He saw something blue at the very bottom of his bag; something that some would say matched his eyes perfectly.

Alec paused whatever he was going to say forgotten.

"Well are you coming or not?" Izzy said sounding annoyed. "I need to get home and change first."

Alec quickly zipped up his bag and recollected his thoughts. "I'll meet you at the institute in 15 minutes."

* * *

Alec pushed the front door open. He saw Izzy and Jace as soon as he got in. Both of them were dressed the opposite of shadowhunter gear.

"I thought we were going hunting." He said raising his eyebrows at his siblings.

Jace stepped forward. He was wearing jeans and a cardigan. "Why? Can't we look good while we deface property and help rid the world of demons?"

Alec narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "Why do you look like you're going on a date?"

Jace shrugged. "It's so the demons I kill can look at something pretty before they die."

Alec looked past him, his eyes getting wide. "And Isabelle why do you look like…"

Izzy interrupted him. "I'm going to a club. That's what Pandemonium is right?" She was wearing a leather dress so short and tight Alec could have sworn it was painted onto her skin.

Jace leaned over. "Her nerd is waiting for her." He whispered.

"So is your fun-sized girlfriend." Izzy snapped back.

"Anyways let's go." Alec said turning to leave. Before he could get one foot out the door two arms pulled him back.

"Hold on. You look like hell." Izzy said.

"You make us look bad." Jace said.

Alec looked down at his clothes which consisted of his usual sweater and jean combination with an added bonus of the stains and rips. "I always dress like this. You guys never had any problem with it before."

"I don't have any problems with it. However, Stacy and Clinton do. Consider it an act of respect for What Not to Wear." Jace said pulling Alec into his room.

* * *

The three Lightwoods stepped outside the club about an hour later. Alec had shaved, showered and had a whole new outfit thanks to his Parabatai.

Alec felt uncomfortable in his new clothes. A double zip-up jacket (which to Alec just looked like a jacket with complicated zippers and way too expensive for his taste) with nothing underneath and rip/stain free jeans.

"Does this mean we aren't hunting?" Alec said irritated that he was being tricked into coming.

"Live a little Alec." Izzy said turning to cut in front of the line.

They got in without any problems thanks to Izzy's flirting and stepped into the chaos that was Pandemonium.

Inside was hot and crowded from all the gyrating bodies against one another. Alec looked over at Clary and Simon coming over to them. They looked out of breath from dancing and did a double take when they saw him.

"Hey Alec, long time no see." Clary said coming up to him.

"I see that someone has been watching the fashion channel with Jace." Simon said.

They all laughed and joked for a bit, Alec almost felt normal like the last month didn't happen. He looked around at everyone and suddenly felt like a…5th wheel if that was possible.

Jace had Clary and Izzy had Simon. He never noticed before that all of them were paired up perfectly. Before he had never felt alone even when Magnus wasn't physically there because Alec knew that Magnus was just a phone call away, even when nobody else knew it.

"I uh, need to use the bathroom." He said excusing himself. He looked back; Izzy was pulling a squirming Simon away to the dance floor. Jace and Clary were dancing slowly in a circle oblivious to everything around them.

Alec stepped towards the wall away from the dance floor and as far away from the others as possible.

He couldn't help but compare the club to the many parties he had attended at Magnus's apartment. Pandemonium was nothing in comparison. Alec hated the parties but went along with it because that's what made Magnus happy. That was all Alec thought about, making him happy.

He looked over to the dance floor which was packed full of terrible dancers all dancing to a different beat. Alec had always hated dancing but did it just so he could watch Magnus. The way he moved had always mesmerized him.

He frowned silently cursing Pandemonium for not selling real alcohol.

He looked around the club trying to pass time and attempting to look like he was alone on purpose. He looked over to the back of the club and noticed a couple running through the crowd. The girl was giggling and the boy was looking at her with a hungry expression. The boy turned and stepped into the supply closet with the girl following after him.

Alec rolled his eyes. "A supply closet? Real classy." He thought but he tensed when he saw past the glamour the boy had on.

Alec cursed again and pulled a seraph knife from his belt. Its' bright color lost in the flashing lights of the club. He ran across the dance floor pushing past all the angry dancers.

Alec was dimly aware that he had no runes on him and no stele to draw some. He burst into the room just as the demon was going for the unconscious girl on the floor.

Alec slipped and the demon seeing the opening lunged at him. They fell to the floor the demon pinning Alec under him. He kicked it as hard as he could manage. Catching the demon off guard he swung his arm in a wide arc. Alec rolled away as the head of the demon fell after him spraying the wall with blood.

Alec smiled and laughed, adrenaline pumping through him. He had forgotten how the heat of a battle could make you feel. He bent over to check the girl when the door burst open followed by Izzy and Jace who both had their weapons drawn.

"Only one? That's hardly fair." Jace pouted stashing his knife into his pocket.

Alec grinned. "Beat you to it, Jace."

Jace shook his head. "And to think I dressed my best for this."

Izzy looked at the two horrified. "Who care about the demon, look what happened to your clothes!"

Alec looked down at what was left of his clothes. The demon blood had eaten holes all over his jacket and jeans. "Just the way I like it." He grinned again.

Izzy glared at him and threw a stele at him. "Put an iratze on. You owe me for that expensive jacket."

"We're not under a glamour so let's get this cleaned up before Simon runs out of bad jokes to distract the security guard." Clary said poking her head through the door.

Alec nodded "Jace get the girl out of here make sure she's ok. Izzy go help Simon distract the security. Clary you go stand guard for me while I clean up." He ordered and surprisingly they all did as he asked. Just like before he loved being the important adult figure of the group.

Alec set to work grabbing a mop and attempted to clean up. He bent over a pile of what looked like paper and turned it over.

He tried to wipe it clean enough so he could read it out loud.

"Come celebrate! New York's most eligible bachelor is now back on the market!..."

"Magnus Bane is Sexy, Free and Single." Alec looked up dropping the papers. Clary reached for one with a confused expression on her face.

"Bring this invitation to get in. Be there tomorrow at midnight." She finished. "We're going to need a lot of these for all of us." She said reaching down for the stack of papers.

Alec grabbed them and threw them into the thrash. "No one is going. It's supposed to be lame anyways." He grabbed Clary and shoved her through the door.

"Where is everyone?" Alec said squinting to see through the bright lights.

"Jace made a big deal and pissed off the security. They got taken out the front." Clary said shrugging.

"Let's go through the back then."

Both of them exited into the back alley.

"I know you want to go." Clary blurted out.

"To what?" Alec said.

Clary stopped him holding up one single invitation. "Go, make him jealous, make up with him and make out with him."

"In that order?" Alec said amused.

"Who cares about the order, just go get him back." Clary said giving him the invitation.

"He doesn't want me back." Alec said taking it.

"He still loves you and you obviously still love him." Clary said. "And since there's only one invitation that means only you can go."

"I wouldn't know what to do." Alec finally admitted.

"I'll help you." Clary said smiling encouragingly.

"What are you going to do? Create rune to go back in time or to help everyone have a happy ending?" Alec said.

Clary tilted her head and paused clearly thinking about it.

"Don't answer that." Alec said walking down the alley towards the street. "You don't have to help me."

Clary ran to catch up to him. "Then I won't help you. If you think about it I'm actually helping Magnus out by getting you two back together. It's the least we could do after he helped us so much trying to get Jace back and all that other stuff."

Alec stopped and looked down at her. "You aren't going to let this go are you?"

"Nope and neither are we." Jace said walking towards them with Izzy and Simon behind him. "Since you got us kicked out of the club, you owe us one."

"Jace is right as usual. Leave it to us Alec." Izzy said casually fixing her already perfect nails.

Alec looked at all of them. They made one stupid family he thought.

"C'mon, there's a lot of work to be done if you want to look hot for tomorrow night." Izzy said steering everyone towards the institution.

Simon took the invitation looking it over. "Technically isn't it more like tomorrow morning since the party starts at midnight?"

* * *

_Sorry guys I wrote this chapter so fast I hope it's okay :/ _

_Wow! It's only been a week since my last update but it seems like forever! I'm trying to update at least every week now especially with school starting. Thanks again for everyone who has stuck with this story so far, without you I would've definitely given up :)  
_


	5. Chapter 5: The Party

"Now where do we start?" Izzy murmured quickly typing up something on the computer. Clary was sitting next to her playing with her sketch pad.

All five of them had set up in the kitchen table. How Izzy got a laptop was a mystery to Alec.

The two girls were "online shopping" as Simon explained to both Alec and Jace.

"Isn't this a waste of time?" Alec sighed looking over at the two girls who were whispering excitedly.

"Shopping is a way of life my good friend that you will never understand." Jace said making a sandwich in the corner.

"Who has time to go places to shop when you could do it in the comfort of your home?" Simon said looking over at the computer screen.

"What are we trying to find again?" Alec said impatiently.

"Not we, us." Izzy said motioning to her and Clary. "This a downworlder party which means you need to look hot and unique. As in no one can have the same outfit."

Clary held up her drawing pad showing a design that no doubt the two had just come up with. "Hot and unique enough for you?"

The three boys crowded around the drawing. Simon snickered and Jace was laughing into his sandwich. Alec stared at it he could feel his mouth open and closing but he couldn't get any words out.

Clary turned the drawing to her. "I think Alec would look really hot in this."

"No, I would look hot in it. Alec on the other hand…" Jace said grinning in his arrogant way.

Alec frowned. The outfit was way out of his comfort zone, which to him consisted of sweaters, plain t-shirts and jeans.

"You're supposed to say challenge accepted." Simon said to him.

Alec tuned everyone out all he could think about staring at the drawing was it reminded him of Magnus.

How many times did he beg Alec to let him do his makeup or dress him up just for fun which Alec had always declined.

The thought made Alec smile, a bitter sweet smile. Thinking back Alec could clearly see the warlock's style of clothes that would make anyone embarrassed to face themselves in the morning but there was something admirable about the way Magnus pulled it off, completely at ease with himself not caring about anyone else's opinion but his own.

Alec always found it funny that it took a war and the possibility that he would die during the battle for him to come out as gay but he would fall in love with such an open and proud person like Magnus.

Alec shook his head bringing his thought back into reality. Jace was arguing with Izzy about the design, both of them yelling at Clary who tossed her pencil away defiantly refusing to make any more changes while Simon was busy typing on the computer.

Alec bit his lip knowing he'd regret it. "Where are we even going to get the clothes?"

All of them paused to look at him with a sense of awe and confusion that he would be agreeing. Izzy jumped up dragging him over to the computer where Simon had set up a bunch of windows with various pieces of clothing on each one.

Clary pointed at her sketch and then at the computer screen. "We just put them all together to see how it would look."

"So we just order it online?" Alec said unsurely.

"That could take weeks, time we don't have." Simon said.

"But luckily we have a 3D copier at our disposal." Jace said mischievously winking at Clary.

Clary pulled out her stele. "First we need to take all the measurements so it comes out right."

Alec stood still as the two girls measured him. He made a face when Izzy told Clary to make the pants a size smaller then his actual size.

Once they were done Clary took her stele and carefully drew a rune on the sketch. Alec gasped as the clothes seemed to come to life.

Izzy took the clothes and threw it at Alec. "Go put it on now."

Alec gulped and took them into the bathroom. Alec's face turned red at everyone's reactions.

"I would date you." Jace said looking him over approvingly which made him blush even harder.

"That outfit would give Magnus a run for his money for sure." Simon said.

Clary gave him a thumbs up the only person who didn't like it was Izzy.

"Needs a little more work." She said pulling out make-up and hairspray from her bag.

* * *

Alec made his way up the stairs of the apartment his watch read exactly 12:00. He couldn't help be punctual even though Izzy had told him it was cooler to be fashionably late. Unlike the last time he'd been there the door was wide open. He could probably hear the music all the way from the institute if he tried hard enough.

The streets were empty which for New York was odd.

Either everyone was at the party or the High Warlock of Brooklyn was showing off his powers by creating a glamour so powerful half of the city was blocked out.

Never underestimate Magnus Bane he thought stepping into the apartment.

Alec could see the whole apartment packed full of bodies from vampires to werewolves to warlocks to faeries. He couldn't see any other shadowhunters but he had no doubt there were some present.

The lights were blinding and the music so loud he could feel the beat making him literally bounce up and down.

Alec pushed his way towards the kitchen which had been turned into a bar. He sighed in relief as he saw an open seat leaving the chaos behind him.

"Give me anything, but something very hard." He said to the bartender.

He looked around downing his drink. He did a spit take when he saw Magnus. He was wearing floral pants and a tank top that looked like it was made out of pure glitter. His piercings shone in the lights and his hair was spiked up to the max. Each a completely different color than the next.

Magnus moved through the crowd and like a good host stopped by to talk and laugh with nearly everyone. Alec gritted his teeth as he saw the downworlders practically throw themselves at him.

Alec had been watching Magnus for so long he panicked when he realized that the warlock was a mere few feet away from where he was sitting. Alec jumped up and threw himself into the crowd. He grabbed the person nearest to him and began dancing.

"You're a terrible dancer you know that."

"Just act like I'm not please." He pleaded.

The girl shrugged but stopped looking into his face with a bewildered expression. "Alec is that you?"

Alec paused squinting through the lights to look at the girl. "Kaelie?"

The faerie nodded still speechless. "You…clothes…make-up…oh…my god." She managed.

Alec blushed looking down at his clothes staring at his new shoes. He was wearing a mesh top cut diagonally at the bottom; it was so see through that you could see his runes all over his chest. He had a white leather vest over it with a blue and white paint splattered jeans. He had chains dripping from them crisscrossing his bottom half. To top it all off Izzy had done his hair making it cover one side of his face with the ends dyed an electric blue. With of course a healthy amount of eyeliner to bring his eyes out as Izzy had explained to him.

Kaelie was looking him over approvingly. "If I didn't know you were gay I'd be all over that."

Alec grimaced. "I'm trying not to look so out of place now can you please dance with me?"

The song changed to something different. Something electronic with different rhythms rising and falling played giving Alec a headache which he ignored and concentrated on Kaelie who was grinding up against him.

His mind started to wander and he found himself looking for Magnus. The warlock was hard to miss even in the crowd of people. Alec found him sitting on a couch with two vampires at his side. The girls were all over him pulling at his clothes kissing his neck, chest, anything that was exposed and Magnus was playing along.

Something snapped inside him. It was like someone was suffocating him, not letting him go but smothering him until he couldn't breaths. Instead of sadness Alec only felt rage. He could feel the anger in his chest, clouding his vision. What angered him the most was the fact that he wasn't completely angry, but jealous.

"Your not really into this are you? Oh..." kaelie trailed off looking over at Magnus.

Alec clenched his jaw refusing to look at his direction. Instead he focused on breathing in and out and counting in his head over and over.

"If you need to get out of here I understand." Kaelie said putting an arm around him.

Alec shrugged it off. "Its fine we're over anyways."

"From your reaction it doesn't seem like it's over."

Alec breathed heavily trying to clear his mind and tried to relax like he was taught to do before he shot an arrow.

"Your not over him." Kaelie said stating the obvious.

"I'm here with you aren't I?"

"Your body is here but your heart and mind are over there. " She said motioning to Magnus.

"How cliche." Alec said turning to leave, "I'm sorry I need a drink."

Kaelie turned him around grabbing his arm firmly. "You know I'm right and if Jace has taught me anything its that if you think you're right then go to no end to prove it."

She looked at Alec with a determined expression.

"You still love him and I'm going to prove that no matter what you can't stop."

Before Alec could comprehend what was happening Kaelie was kissing him.

* * *

**This was more of a filler but I didn't want to keep you guys waiting...to make up for it I'll post a new chapter soon...very soon ;) **

**I write impulsively so maybe alec will end up with kaelie they sound kinda cute together...i mean magnus is getting it on with them vampires so i don't know...**

**Anyways, thank you for all the continued support! This story would probably be discontinued without your support :D **


	6. Chapter 6: MALEC

**Hello my readers! **

**Just wanted to say this story has been the funnest thing to do (and hardest) And it sucks that it had to end and I hope you all are satisfied with this ending...**

**~enjoy  
**

* * *

Alec couldn't even remember what he was about to say or do. He tried to pull away but couldn't, all he could was keep his eyes open and wait for it to be over.

He didn't move but she was persistent. Kaelie wrapped her hands around his neck pulling him closer deepening the kiss. Images of Magnus earlier flashed through his mind, Alec could feel jealousy mixed with anger boiling inside making it hard for him to think.

Didn't Aline once tell him that she had to experiment a little before she could honestly say that there were no guys that she liked?

So he decided to make the most of it.

He hesitantly closed his eyes and slowly put his hands on both sides of her hips kissing her back. Her lips were soft and he could feel something sticky like lip gloss on her lips. She was soft, fragile almost Alec was almost afraid if he touched her any more than that she would break.

She smelled like flowers and something sweet like vanilla. Not the smell of magic and sandalwood that he was used to.

She was a lot shorter than Magnus. She was more delicate than him too. Magnus had a slim built, he was lean but not to muscular. His lips were soft but not delicate like hers. Their lips melded perfectly together when they kissed.

Unlike right now, his lips felt awkward and out of place with Kaelie's. The kiss was sloppy and he felt tense and uncomfortable which was the opposite feeling with Magnus. Kissing him was effortless.

He was kissing Kaelie and he knew it but all he could think about was Magnus…Magnus…Magnus. It was unfair for him to compare the two but he couldn't help it.

Alec could feel Kaelie stop, her hands letting go of his neck. Alec panicked thinking he had done something wrong he stepped back trying to apologize but realized something wasn't right.

Everyone in the room was frozen, like someone pushed the pause button on a movie. Alec blinked trying to make sense of the situation.

Someone was moving towards him from across the room so fast it looked like he was running. Alec tensed pulling out his seraph knife.

* * *

Magnus put on his best face. It was his party; everyone looked like they were having a good time so why should he be the only not enjoying it. He literally invited everyone he knew or didn't know. He had sent out enough invitations for at least half the whole downworlder population.

He tried to play the typical host; talking to everyone, laughing at the right moments, making sure there was plenty to drink and making sure everyone was happy even if he wasn't.

He was never that fond of faerie drugs, they made you do crazy things but tonight he didn't care.

The next thing he knew he was being cornered by two vampires who dragged him to the couch. He definitely wasn't looking for a committed relationship and it was obvious that they weren't either.

He just played along with it, its' not like he was tied down to anyone anymore. He leaned in to kiss one of the vampires when he saw something that caught his eyes.

It was Kaelie, the waitress from Taki's, the person who convinced him to have the party in the first place. She was dancing with someone but as he turned to leave she captured him in a forceful kiss.

Magnus dropped his glass when he recognized the man. It wasn't just anybody but a certain shadowhunter. Alexander Lightwood to be exact.

Magnus didn't know what came over him. A little part of him wondered why Alexander was even kissing girl. But the bigger part of him wanted to scream in frustration or jealousy he couldn't tell.

This was what Magnus had wanted for Alexander right? To move on with someone better, someone that he could have a life with, grow old with, and die with. Then why was Magnus regretting everything?

He had told Alexander that they we're done. That he didn't want to see him anymore or have anything to do with him.

Magnus had tried, he really did. He tried to distract himself enough to not think about it, time would make him forget all the painful memories. It always worked well enough before.

So why?

Why wasn't it working now?

He didn't know what happened but he could feel electricity coursing through his body, blue sparks bursting from his finger tips hitting the wall and making the lights shatter, glass falling down like rain. He got up from the couch pushing past the two vampires with only one goal in mind.

* * *

Alec crouched low, his seraph knife blazing through the darkness. Somehow all of the lights had simultaneously shattered leaving the whole apartment in utter darkness. He squinted at the figure closing in on him.

Blazing green cat eyes locked onto his bright blue ones.

Before Alec could say anything the figure came up to him pulling him away from Kaelie angrily kissing him.

Alec recognized those lips, the ones that stole his first kiss, first date and first heartbreak.

The kiss was hard and messy. It felt like all of Magnus's hate and frustrations were being crushed down onto his lips.

Alec coming to his senses pushed Magnus at an arms distance, lips red and swollen from the kiss.

Magnus looked around confused not looking at Alec clearly.

"Did you do this?" Alec said motioning around the both of them.

Magnus looked around for the first time taking in their surroundings. "I think I just froze time."

Alec raised his eyebrows, "There's easier ways to get rid of your party guests."

Magnus clenched his jaws staring at him. "Actually I just wanted to get rid of one in particular."

"By kissing me? What happened to just asking me to leave." Alec said glaring at him.

"No I meant the faerie." Magnus said looking at Kaelie.

That wasn't the answer Alec was expecting. "Why?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Magnus said crossing his arms.

Alec blushed thinking about the awkward kiss but his temper got the better of him. "What does it matter to you? You broke up with me remember?" He said echoing Magnus's earlier words to him.

"Don't you think I know that? It's been killing me every day!"

"You should have thought about that before you said you wanted nothing to do with me."

Magnus ran his hands through his hair in frustration messing up the perfect spikes. "What did you want me to do? Tell you that it's ok that you wanted to shorten my life? That you rendezvousing with Camille was completely ok with me?"

"I wanted you to trust me! You know me better than that!" Alec cried.

"You never trusted me. Everyone in my past was suddenly your enemy." Magnus retorted back.

"You didn't give me many reasons to trust you."

"You should have trusted me when I said you weren't trivial and that the past doesn't matter."

"The past always matters; it's what defines us Magnus."

Alec flinched thinking Magnus was going to punch him again or at least burn him into ashes but to his surprise Magnus just wrapped his arms around him and held him tight.

They were quiet for a a few minutes before Magnus spoke up.

Alec could feel Magnus's breath tickling his ears as he whispered. "You're right. I'm sorry. I never invested so much of myself in a relationship like this before" He paused taking in a deep breath.

"Can't you understand that the past is hard for me to talk about? It's painful and I try to forget because that's the only thing you can do when you live forever. I don't want you to be another memory in my past that I'll have to forget."

"I know you wouldn't have taken my immortality." He added a little breathless from his speech.

"I was unfair too; I shouldn't even have thought about it, I was being selfish." Alec said burying his face into Magnus's hair. "But I'm here now, whatever happens in the future we'll face together. I do trust you, if that counts for anything."

"Then how about a second chance?" Magnus said pulling away from him enough to give him a light kiss on the lips.

"Done." Alec said kissing him back. "But you should do something about your party guest."

"Before that how about we go somewhere more private? I hate having an audience."

Alec looked over at Kaelie. "I have to ask my date first."

Magnus shrugged. "She's not going anywhere…but I am curious. Who's the better kisser? Her or me?"

Alec thought for a minute before answering. "I couldn't tell. I kept thinking about you, but I didn't like it, it felt weird."

"No more experimenting than?" Magnus said grinning ear to ear.

"No, I'm good." Alec said returning the smile.

"I like your new outfit by the way. Too bad it has to come off." Magnus said pulling him towards the master bedroom.

Alec smirked. "What if I want to keep it on?"

"Too bad, I want it."

THE END!...

* * *

**The end...or is it? I was thinking of maybe doing an epilogue just for the fun of it (wedding bells anyone? haha) :D **

**Oh! Let me give some props and thanks to my buddy _Dancing With The Enemy_ for giving me that awesome cover photo for Past or Future? **

**Once again thanks for all the support, it was really fun and maybe I'll see you guys later on a new fanfic  
**


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